I Have No Idea What Time It Is
Look, I know Daylight Savings Time was created with the best of intentions, but isn’t it time we knocked that shit off? We have ELECTRICITY now. Any time can be …
Epilogue: The First Light of Dawn
Well, folks, that’s been “Gnome-pocalypse.” Hope you enjoyed it. If you missed a few parts or just want to start at the beginning and read it straight through, here’s the …
Part Eight: Sometimes These Things Just Happen
Two tall, thin, immaculately-dressed men stepped through the splintered mess that was once a proper entryway and into Rosa’s view. Behind them, the front yard was nothing but small chunks …
Part Seven: Clawing Hands & Gnashing Teeth
Rosa and Calvin were outnumbered, several thousand to two. For every garden gnomes they were able to destroy or hurl across the room, six more took its place. The gnomes …
Part Six: Shut Up and Kill Something
The higher the carnivorous gnomes climbed upon one another, their snapped ceramic fingers scratching for the counter, the farther back Rosa and Calvin scrunched, until they were wedging themselves uncomfortably …